Jews Sink Titanic!

An airplane takes off from the airport. The captain is Jewish and the first officer is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together, and it's obvious by the silence that they don't get along.
After thirty minutes, the Jewish captain speaks, "I don't like Chinese!"
The first officer replies, "Oooooh, no like Chinese? How so?"
The captain says, "You bombed Pearl Harbor! That's why I don't like Chinese!"
The first officer protests, "Noooo, noooo! Chinese not bomb Pearl Habbah! That
Japanese, not Chinese!"
The captain answers, "Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese. You're all the same!"

Another thirty minutes of silence.
Finally the first officer says, "No like Jew!"
The captain replies, "Why not? Why don't you like Jews?"
The first officer says, "Jews sink Titanic!"
The captain protests, "No, no! The Jews didn't sink the Titanic. It was an
The first officer replies, "Iceberg, Goldberg, Rosenberg. All same!"


A Lesson in Marketing

Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Rome. One has a cross in front of him, the other a Star of David. Many people walk by and observe the beggars, but put money only into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest comes by and watches the throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none giving money to the beggar behind the Star of David.

Finally, the priest says to the beggar behind the Star of David, "My poor fellow! This is a Catholic country! People aren't going to give you money if you're sitting with a Star of David in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross in front of him! In fact, they're probably giving to him just out of spite!"

The beggar behind the Star of David listened politely to the priest, turned to the other beggar behind the cross and said,"Moishe, look who's trying to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing!"


Yokes sent in by Asher Motola -and that's no yoke! Thanks, Asher.
Have a good Jewish joke? Send it in to yeshuastouch@hawaii.rr.com.